Every dad is able to do three things: dance badly, assemble furniture improperly and give advice weirdly. The second a man’s first child is born, the man gains those skills. Sorry, but that’s just the way it is.

Have you ever asked your dad for advice and got a hilariously weird or weirdly hilarious answer back? You know you have. Dads are gold mines of funny wisdom, whether that’s ha ha funny or strange funny.

Here are 20 examples of the funniest dad advice of all time:

1. The answer to most of life’s questions is alcohol, after all

She would have appreciated a “no.” But an answer is an answer, no matter how evasive.

2. Do you have any colleagues who could have used this advice?

Think about it, talking must be one of the leading causes of unemployment.

3. How much dad advice begins with the words “Stop crying”?

We’ll wager that it’s a lot!

4. Can you fault the logic here?

And engineers are good at fixing stuff. It’s a win win!

5. At least that proves that he’s attentive

This is why dads tend not to run daycares.

6. Hopefully, this guy’s dad wasn’t a lifeguard

It’s not likely anyone ever drowned in the ocean or anything.

7. Again, there’s no faulting this logic

Imagine this guy’s dating app profile! “Divorcees only, please!”

8. Was this his political advice too?

Maybe this is why so many politicians are going for the center ground? So many people must have heard this kind of thing growing up.

9. It’s not like you have to tell the guy you’re dating that you’ve done this

Yes, it’s a little extreme, but at least he’s looking out for his daughter.

10. How many of these could be Homer Simpson quotes?

But what if it’s something you want to do?

11. It makes sense. After all, you can run a car on vegetable oil

The three main food groups right there.

12. At least it wasn’t for a 13th birthday

Everyone knows you just fill water bottles with vodka.

13. If you think about it, this is true

Sooner or later, we are all out of words.

14. Someone missed living the single lifestyle

Did he really draw out the word “cool”?

15. Forbidden fruit, literally

Who else wants to see this dad’s fruit quality rankings? Where do strawberries factor in!?

16. Did the mom ask him to be more positive?

“Creative” won’t hold up in court, sadly.

17. You’re meant to scare them on Halloween

Is there any better way of spreading Christmas cheer than by building arson fear?

18. But what if you can’t get good at not getting caught?

The “Sin” in Sinram gives us a clue as to how she uses this advice.

19. Driving is technically the most dangerous activity that people do on any day

That means you’ll be really safe when you lose your license.

20. The dad that supports philanthropy

The best things in life are free, they say.

You may not want to give some (or even any) of the above advise to your own children. But isn’t that the beauty of parenthood? There’s no one right way to be a father or a mother. Some parents give time outs. Others threaten to burn the house down on Christmas Eve. And who are we to judge which method is healthier?

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Source: Bored Panda